...is like a river

Ok another post. In case you haven't figured it out its not exactly a people pleaser topic. It does have a point though.

The love for a good friend. F3. Good friends aren't easy to find. I'm not exactly talking about great friends; just good ones. F3's are your good friends that you enjoy hanging out with. They're the guys on the Ultimate team. They're the people that you probably spend most of your time with. You love them and you really love spending time with them.

What's the opposite emotion to F3? I think the opposite emotion to F3 love would be a deep sadness. If your F3 friend took off or did some jerk thing you'd probably more sad than angry. This is opposed to F2 where if they did some jerk thing you'd be pretty angry. Likewise if an F3 left they would definitely be missed. If an F3 died; they would be mourned; again the sadness.

Ok only like two more posts to go. F4 and F5. I have the lamest names for these dumb things.





Paul "I love Paul's shirt" Murphy

Blah blah blah

Continuing the series on horribly defined words we find ourselves in third category of love. Yeah!!!

The third type of love would have to be that between two acquaintances, friends you might say. We will call this F2 for sake of not ever having to spell acquaintances again.

To define F2 it is easier to say who they are. F2's are the people that lived on your dorm hall that you would say hi to in passing and maybe play video games with later that evening. These people are your friends. One analogy would be to say that they are your "facebook" or "myspace" type friends where you might have found out more about them from a social networking sight than you ever did in any brief conversation. They are proxy people you hang out with and you love them as F2's.

F2 is different than F1 because you have a more personal connection with the person, more than people you don't know at all that is. If an F2 were to leave and you would never see them again you would probably say by and not think twice about it. There will be many other F2's in your life so you're not real worried about this one leaving.

The type of love you feel for F2's is (is this sounding like a chinese horoscope?) is a friendly knowledge and relationship. Some people might call this "Muv" or manly love. You usually don't share much with them and visa versa. You always hope for the best for these people but aren't going out of your way to make sure they reach their dreams.

The opposite emotion to F2 love is also best described by the person it deals with. You know that douche who ganked your parking spot, acts like a jerk, name is Brad Be11amy, cut in the dryer line at the laundry mat, drives a golf cart around campus, or says mean things about your truck? That dislike for that person is the opposite of the love for the F2.

Ohhh only about two more crappy posts to go. Someone should tell Brad to slow down on the desert.

Paul "I like you as an F2" Murphy

Friendly Love

Ok now for the next level of "love." This love is friendly love or F1. Once again not very specific. Friendly love is a very general love. Its like when a hippy says "I love the forest." Or if someone says I love people. Its general and vague.

Now how do we really define this general term. I think the best way is to identify the emotion that goes with it. So lets say a hippy says, "I love the rain forest." Now obviously rain forests are destroyed every day. You don't see them going into deep depression over it. Now they may be sad but nothing real serious. Likewise if someone says "I love everybody" they surely don't have a deep connection with everybody. They also might possibly be on drugs. Lets say a bus in Pakistan with 87 people careens over a cliff. Are they traumatized and disheartened? No, they continue on with a brief moment of sadness. F1 love is mostly a friendly love.

Paul "this is lame" Murphy

Nondescript Words

I really don't like words that don't mean much. Like the word "surgery." What does it mean for someone to have surgery? Sure they get cut open. But someone can be like, "I'm having surgery" and you can still have no clue what's going on. Are they removing your heart and replacing it with a pump or are you getting a mole removed? It's a bad word because it can mean so many different things. A better way would be to be descriptive about what kind of surgery you're having.

The same goes for possibly the most horrifically defined word in the English language; love. There are 21 different definitions for "love" at dictionary.com. Holy Cow! What the smash does it mean. So that's this weeks series: What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me; no more. Dun dun dundun dun dun dun.


So how do we define an emotion? My friend Stephen L. says emotions come in pairs. So to better identify the type of love we'll identify the emotion that goes with it. We'll also talk about how you might use that version in situations.

The first type of love may be the simplest. This love we'll call "Like Love." LL is like "I love Dwight from The Office." Now this doesn't mean I want to marry Dwight. Nor do I want to do anything in a bedroom with him. All it means is "I really like Dwight from The Office." I could have said "really like" but "love" was shorter. We could also say "I love it when little kids and old people fall down." What? Well its really funny. I really enjoy it when little kids and old people take a spill, as long as they're not seriously injured. Its just funny. We use LL when we really like something. The emotion that goes with it would be mild disappointment. I.E. the kid stumbled but did not fall, awe man. We should not use LL ever when talking about how we feel about other people; as there is very little emotional attachment in LL. LL is only for non-proper nouns and verbs.


Paul "voguing in his chair" Murphy

The Way of the Future

I'd like to take a moment and get a reoccurring theme off my chest. Coal power sucks. Yes that's right. Using coal for anything sucks. Let me take that back. Using charcoal for grilling stuff is ok, but natural gas is better. But still Coal is bad. Here is something really bad: burning coal to heat a water tank to create power. You'redumb. Especially when there's a cheaper way of doing it.

Now there's been lots of talk recently about wind and solar power. Unfortunately there are too many places that don't have enough sunlight or wind year-round to make it efficient. Those are probably the best ways of getting electricity. But here's a thought; how does the sun make power? I really wish we could harness the sun's magnanimous ability to make energy. (I just used that word incorrectly) I wish there was some way to split an atom apart and harness the energy, that energy that is multiplied by the speed of light squared. But there's not...

Oh wait... Oh wait... yes... yes... I think there might be. Maybe that's what this "Nuclear Power Plant" thingy is. When are we going to wake up and smell the 50 year old coffee. Obviously if Albert Gore wins a Nobel prize for saying CO2 is heatin' everything up then maybe we should... I don't know... reduce CO2 emissions. Oh Oh I have a suggestion. Lets harness this old technology that we've been developing for the past 60 years and use it to make electricity. Nuclear Power is the way of the future. Even Iran gets it.

I read this great article today here about Kansas rejecting a coal power plant. Yeah for Kansas. Lets look at the advantages of Nuclear power.
1. Drastically less CO2 output
2. Cheapest form of major electric production at 1.72 cents per kilowatt
Wait, wait, wait. I just saved money and the environment. What else be said?

Cons
1. Nuclear waste
2. Nuclear reactors are constantly exploding all over the world. Just look at Russia

Oh wait... it only happened once in the horribly regulated Soviet Union.

As for the waste I agree its a problem. On the other hand Dad already found a place for it in Nevada. So it'll be neighbors with Stephen.

Also I heard somewhere that New Zealand passed a resolution banning nuclear power in their country. Good for them. I don't want NZ's having nuclear power anyways. They're idiots. And I think they've watched one too many Simpson's episodes. What good does it do if you ban something you don't have access to anyways??? I digress.

Ok that's my rant for today. Go Nuclear Power. Safe. Clean. and Murphycheap.

Paul "I love cooling towers" Murphy

Break

So I've been on my "fall break" here this week. Yes an entire week of not teaching. Good stuff. What have I been doing with my time? Nothing. It rocks.

The Nuuuli Church has been having a gospel meeting at night, so I've been going to that the past few nights. The singing is great. The sermons are gospel meeting sermons. I'd never really been to a gospel meeting before so I guess its what I expected. The best part is I've gotten to meet people from the other two congregations. These are people I should know. So its been fun.

Philip started his "Real American Samoa Heroes" series on his blog. Its a spin off of the Bud Light commercials. We stayed up way too late recording the first one but its excellent. You should go check it out. Its kind of island jokes so I'm not sure how funny it is to other people. To us its hilarious.

In other news Gus the truck is back up and running. I fixed the starter and that was cool. In celebration I went and bought a new seat cover for the driver's seat. Its a cool islandy pulani flower pattern.

Paul "Don't you go stealin'" Murphy

Blog Stalking

We all do it. You know you do. There's that person's blog who is sometimes interesting and you like reading it. Never mind that you may have never met them or anyone that has a chance of remotely knowing them. You know you do it. And you never leave a message either because you know that what you're doing is a little creepy.

In fact there are probably at least 10 people who will read this who I don't really know. How do I know? I reverse blog stalk people with my statcounter. Yes it tells me where you're coming from and how often you decided to drop by. I would also like to take this time to thank my first visitors from Estonia and South Africa.

I am also going to take this occasion to ask people a favor. As we know Google is the most popular search engine. It also "owns" this blogspace. So whenever people Google something my sorry blog will come up if its slightly obscure. That being said please stop Googling my name, Paul Murphy, and the word "moron." I've now become the first hit for searches such as "Moron Paul." Ummm excellent I'm being cemented into internet fame-dom as a moron. Please just memorize the url or bookmark the page.

Mental note: quit putting people's names in my blogs. I don't think Ken appreciated my comments, among others.

So here are some blogs I've been stalking recently. They're quite interesting.

Dixon Kinser: Episcopalian

Holly from Charleston who worked at Gravatt this summer

Random Nashville writer

Three Girls in Kenya building a library. Stephen last I checked two of them were single so...

And somebody tell Aimee' Nichols0n to either stop stalking my blog or go to the ball field.

Why she so secretive about her blog anyways? I bet she just blogs about me. Weirdo.


Paul "every step you take, every vow you break..." Murphy

Putting Off the Inevitable

So first I had this really great post about the lottery and how math teachers never factor in inflation when they tell you to take the 20 year pay-out. The I had this other great post about how democracy in a big country is different then small ones. And how the whole democratic process seems to be changing in our country because of the sheer numbers. But then I decided nobody wanted to hear it.

So the other day I was walking home from school. As I walked by the hotel I was surprised by a couple of ladies jogging on the other side of the street. I wasn't surprised that they were ladies but that they were jogging. Samoans don't jog. In fact I can't really think of a time I've seen a Samoan involved in any aerobic exercise. But then again these ladies weren't Samoan either. I hadn't seen them before. So then I had this conversation in my head:

Them: Hey, how's it going?

Me: Things are going well?

Them: So you live here?

Me: Yup for about a year. You?

Them: Yah.

Then they introduce themselves and I introduce myself. Upon our introduction they mention that they've run across my blog, as so many people here on island regularly flock to it. (not really). Then I was slightly insulted, in my own dream none-the-less.

Them: I thought you'd be taller.

Me: So did I. I was at least hoping for 5'10". But now I can never play professional football.

So in my own thoughts while walking down the street I began to think about how being 5'8" has affected me. It's strange. And maybe not even worth mentioning. I am what most people would refer to as "short." At least for a guy. In the US the average male is about 5'10" tall. That puts me at short. To compound matters I've always been short. In middle school the only person I was taller than in the 7th grade was the girl that was handicap. Yes that's right. By my sophomore year of HS I managed to just squeak over 5'2" tall. Ooooh.

It wasn't till I got to college that I realized that 5'8" was going to be it. I was kind of disappointed. On some level the whole being shorter than average thing hurts your self image. Now maybe Bland and Whit can disagree with me but it stunts you a little. I remember not really participating in sports in High school because I was short, and people reminded me more than I wanted them to. It begins to gnaw at you; especially after about 10 years of public education.

So what does it mean? I don't really know. I'd be lying if I told you it never kept me from doing something or even asking a girl out. I can remember one girl my sophomore year of college that I never asked out because she was like 6'1". I didn't think I'd have a problem but surely that would be weird for her. I actually had a conversation with a lady once in which she demanded that she would never date somebody shorter than her. Which was good because I didn't want her asking me out anyways.

But how shallow is that? I've heard a lot of people complain that guys can be vain, and only want to date "hot" girls. But "he's too short" is definitely just as bad as "she's got a big nose." It's not something you can really help. Oh crap I think I may have both. Crap.

So what does it mean. I don't know. But I do know that two of the best guys I knew in college, who's average height was 5'7" maybe, maybe had more than 10 non-function dates between the two of them. So ladies next time you get asked out by Branson Bridg3s or some other short guy don't write him off immediately. Just go out with him and God will reward you later for your kindness. You can ditch him later.

Paul "I'm shorter than the average KOREAN!" Murphy

Fighting

I'm really fighting a post about our country imprisoning German citizens of Lebanese decent. uhhgg. Somebody needs to re-read the Constitution.

Anyway we don't come to the blog to hear about news, that's what news stations are for. We come to the blog to hear a dumb story, or maybe a story about a dummy, and to see Paul Murphy stick his foot in his mouth. So here we go.

My friend Michelle sent me a list of "Christian Pick-up lines." Its a long list. We should definitely add to the list.

So here on mine:

Are you a young widow? Cause you know what Paul says....

You want sit by me at Potluck/Dinner on the grounds?

Can I rest my arm on the pewback?

The blue song-book really brings out the color in your eyes

Yeah its small, but I like to keep the Oxford Annotated Bible at home

So how are you doing on that whole "women are saved through child bearing" thing?

Baby I'd write in the sand for you...

Hey sweet thang, you want turn the pages of my bible?

You know, I'd sit in the desert for seven days with you after childbirth.



Ok after that I've got nothing. Help me out here and post your bad Christian pick-up lines.

Paul "hey baby; me" Murphy

Sorry CD players

To most people the invention of the CD and the subsequent cd player was a glorious revolution of music-dom. A giant leap from the 8-track, cassette and laser disk. Note to all old people: I don't want to hear your 8-track, laser disc, or any comment about vinyl. P.S. They still make vinyl records. And quit complaining about it and just order the USB record player from a Sharper Image catalog. Then you can turn all of your James Taylor stuff into MP3. Yeah. Back to the post.

In our house the cd player was not met with great cheers and applaud. I remember hating cd's. See after we got our cd players Mom and Dad purchased the Hallal music series. Mom would cheerfully sing along with the cd's while we did saturday chores. I hated it. Not that my mother can't sing I just hated the songs. It really added insult to injury. There's not much more that's worse than cleaning out the chicken coup then hearing "WeEEE Are children of the..." It hurts to type it.

So to this day I HATE the Hallal series. I can't stand their songs. And as a derivation of the Hallal music comes Ken Young. If you're not familiar with Ken Young he "wrote" many of the songs in our wonderful Faith and Praise song book. Ken really didn't write many of them he just takes decent songs and switches them around a little bit and makes money off of them. He is often referred to as the "arranger." So basically this guy takes good songs and butchers them into Hallalish drudgery and dismay. Oh I think he works for Hallal. It's awful.

So what does my mother singing along with Hallal cds and my dislike of Ken Young have to do with anything? There songs haunt me. They don't haunt me in the sense that they get stuck in my head, or I dream about them its really much worse. Many of the older people at our sunday night devotional LOVE Ken Young songs and the Hallal style. In fact our devotional song book has at least 20 Ken Young songs in it. Yuk! But they're probably there illegally so Ken if you read this please sue my church for the rights of your songs back. Some nights I think if I have to sing one more Ken Young song I'm going to walk out.

Maybe I just suck at praise

Paul "being tortured slowly" Murphy

Sim Church

I thought of this great idea for a video game. Lately I've been playing "Pirates" a Sid Meir x-box goody. Meir tries to put together somewhat realistic games. You might know him from his Civilization series. good stuff to burn a few hours and brain cells. But today lightning struck.

Church! would be the best selling game, ever. Both heathens and brethren alike would love to dabble in the workings of a simulated church. First you'd choose a time period your church started. First Century to the present. Granted there are a few hundred years your church might be dominated by a liturgical overlord, but it'd still be great. Teach your priest to speak Latin! Uh oh, you're out of communion bread. What to do? Make a quick batch or cancel communion?

I think a great spin-off and second series could be Church!: church of Christ. This version would be a little different. You'd choose how your church started for starters. Was your church: planted, a missonaried, or most likely, came from a split. It'd be easiest with the last option because your leadership would already be pretty much cemented and your members would all be like-minded. From there you would navigate your church through the perils of modern church politics. Uh-oh! those song books are getting old! Do you replace them with the blue "Faith and Praise" book or the red one? Does our church invest in a powerpoint projector system? How do we get our church to not plateau.

You'd have to adjust the budget yearly depending on what your church wanted. Every now and then your secretary would quit and you'd have to find a new one, "The search is on! Who will you get to answer the phone?" You'd also have to work with the preacher. Send him to seminars. And sometimes hire and fire. There would be the "Fire Em!" button when member approval dropped too low. Then you'd have to find a new person to hire. But who? Old? young? Bible degree? You get to choose!

And every now and then you'd have a natural disaster type event.
"Youth group uses guitar at Friday night devotional! Members are angry. Other churches disfellowship you!"
"Minister mentions chewing tobacco as a sin! Rednecks threaten to leave!"
"Maroon carpet begins to fade!"
"Instrumental music accidentally played during communion! College student reprimanded!" "Couple goes missing during lock-in! Parents upset!"
"Preacher's daughter gets pregnant while not married!"
"Rat found in kitchen before potluck! Visitors leave!"
"Preacher disagrees with the Eldership! Your church splits!"

And that would eventually be how every game of Church!: church of Christ ended. Everybody leaves.

Paul "just for kicks" Murphy

Conservation of Greatness

Conservation of greatness is the first law of Person. There are other similar laws such as "conservation of matter" and "conservation of energy." But Conservation of Greatness seems to be the truest of all.

It was quite evident that matter cannot be created or destroyed. Science tells us so. So how'd we get here again Mr. Scientist? ....Yah but matter cannot be created... Anywho. It is scientific truth that matter cannot be created or destroyed. There is just matter in the universe and that's all the matter we get to use. Its like being a 3 year old living in the sticks with only so much playdo. Once all that playdo winds up in the crack of the table and your stomach there's no more. (hang with me a little longer)

The same goes with energy. It cannot be created. Nor can it be destroyed. It can't be "used up" only transfered.

The same goes with persons and greatness. It seems that each of us only has so much greatness in our being. We can only attain so much. And that greatness cannot be taken from us, created, or destroyed. Take the volleyball player for instance. They make a great diving dig and up the ball to their setter. They quickly get up and move in for the kill. But they shank it into the net because by that time their body doesn't its normal rhythm. Conservation of greatness.

I also look at people like Thomas Jefferson to support the idea of the conservation. One of the most revolutionary ideas ever purposed. "All men are created equal." What? That's... that's... that's... brilliant. Nobody is "better" than me. We are- equal. Fundamentally at our core the same. Wow. Especially during an era of Kings, empires, sultans, and slaves. What a beautiful thought. How great to be "equal."

But that's where Jefferson's greatness might have begun to play out. The consummate irony of a great political thinker. Ideology is easier than practice. Jefferson owned slaves; something inherently unequal. And slept with them. There was only so much greatness he could posses.

Martin Luther- Great revolutionary. Followed in Jan Huss' footsteps and lead the greatest revolt ever. In his younger years he was pure and forging. Bold and beefy. But near his later years in life was very ant-semitic and became somewhat curt. Conservation of greatness.

In history we can see that nobody is great. Everybody has their flaws that constrict their greatness. Recently is was discovered in Mother Theresa's diary that her faith in God wavered. In the best movies the hero dies.

Nobody's perfect. Its a sad lesson. It hurts our view of "heros." It puts a scratched cover over our achievements. Its our humanness. Or maybe our ability to be super-human. Its a conservation of greatness.

Paul "Go Cocks" Murphy