Stories of a Moron

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Nondescript Words

I really don't like words that don't mean much. Like the word "surgery." What does it mean for someone to have surgery? Sure they get cut open. But someone can be like, "I'm having surgery" and you can still have no clue what's going on. Are they removing your heart and replacing it with a pump or are you getting a mole removed? It's a bad word because it can mean so many different things. A better way would be to be descriptive about what kind of surgery you're having.

The same goes for possibly the most horrifically defined word in the English language; love. There are 21 different definitions for "love" at dictionary.com. Holy Cow! What the smash does it mean. So that's this weeks series: What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me; no more. Dun dun dundun dun dun dun.


So how do we define an emotion? My friend Stephen L. says emotions come in pairs. So to better identify the type of love we'll identify the emotion that goes with it. We'll also talk about how you might use that version in situations.

The first type of love may be the simplest. This love we'll call "Like Love." LL is like "I love Dwight from The Office." Now this doesn't mean I want to marry Dwight. Nor do I want to do anything in a bedroom with him. All it means is "I really like Dwight from The Office." I could have said "really like" but "love" was shorter. We could also say "I love it when little kids and old people fall down." What? Well its really funny. I really enjoy it when little kids and old people take a spill, as long as they're not seriously injured. Its just funny. We use LL when we really like something. The emotion that goes with it would be mild disappointment. I.E. the kid stumbled but did not fall, awe man. We should not use LL ever when talking about how we feel about other people; as there is very little emotional attachment in LL. LL is only for non-proper nouns and verbs.


Paul "voguing in his chair" Murphy

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