Story and Broken
Forgot this great story. So there are several bus companies that run through NZ that are private backpacker oriented buses. I'm on the Stray bus with Mori the post hippy surfer NZ'er. Anyways he makes fun of his competition buses, but knows most of the drivers as they probably see each other quite a bit as there is only so much to see in one place. Anyways we're driving down the road and Mori spots a Kiwi Experience bus coming in the opposite direction. So Mori calls for everybody to go to flash the other bus as we past it. He hollers for people to come to the front. We all just laughed and sat there. So as the Kiwi experience bus passed us Mori lifted his shirt along with a younger Dutch guy. We laughed some more. Mori then told us we sucked for not flashing the other bus. At that point the 61 year old lady pipes up and informs us that she too flashed the other bus. Ewwww! I almost chundered on the cute girl I was "holding hands" with. That story is entirely true expect for the last phrase.
Broken
Riding along the bus and watching people interact in foreign places with foreign people has brought something I've been thinking about into full light. The brokenness of People. By broken I'm talking about the incompleteness that is evident in many peoples lives. Not necessarily some religious aspect but something else. I think a lot, make that most, people don't think of themselves as complete. They think something is missing, that they are not good enough in one way or the other. We all deal with this feeling of brokenness to one degree or anther.
To be whole, complete. Nobody is perfect. But what is it about some people that seems like they are complete? There are some people out there that... that... seem to have it together. They don't readily think of themselves as lacking in any way. Not just a confidence issue but something else. I like to think I'm slowly making my way to being complete. But how?
Everybody has trash, crap, junk in their lives. Some of it is their own fault, some of it was caused by something, someone, else. Everybody has a little brokenness in their lives. There's no getting around it. Like the bumper sticker says "'Stuff' happens." And sometimes that stuff hurts and breaks us, emotionally. Being broken emotionally leaves us two choices, maybe more, but two for now.
Choice one is to ignore the broken part of us and seek acceptance from others. This is what I've seen on my trip. People yearning for acceptance. Incomplete people that mask their brokenness by other avenues. Its really visible in guy/girl interactions. Two broken people trying to fill some missing void of brokenness by... by... other means. Its the mutual crutch. You lean on me and I'll lean on you. But we all know what happens when you lean two things against each other. It only takes a slight movement to knock everything down. The yearning that broken people feel leads them to yearn for acceptance, in sometimes self-destructive ways.
As a guy looking for dates/relationships/whatever one thing I've keyed in on is brokenness and how a person deals with it. It's completely unattractive. Maybe its attractive to others, but not me. Maybe really broken people find other really broken people for some fleeting feeling of acceptance.
Choice two is a better choice. Choice two involves addressing the brokenness directly. Sometimes I feel inadequate because... You fill in the blank. Recognize the issue and deal with it directly, not by looking for verification from other people that your O.K. It shouldn't matter what other people think, and if that's your standard then your doomed to fail. What should matter is what you think. I think I'm good enough.
I'm short. Ok I'm 23 and still have acne. Ok. One ear sticks out further than the other. Ok. My nose is comparable to Tom Cruise. Ok. Emotionally. I've been rejected and turned down. Ok. Does that mean there is something wrong with me? No. Does a teacup still crack when you drop it? Yup. But is the teacup any less useful because you super-glued it back? Nope. Just as good as new. Just as covering brokenness is incredibly unattractive, people who have dealt with it, acknowledged the crack, and super-glued the teacup of their life back together is freaking hot.
Just like an un-mended teacup doesn't work right; neither does an un-mended person. Its ok to have some cracks; we all do. But what's important is to recognize and repair them. Otherwise we wind up looking for verification of our wholeness from other sources than from within. And they don't work.
How do I know my cracked teacup is good enough and not something to be sold for 5 cents in a garage sale? Like an old poster in a preacher's office once proclaimed, "Because God doesn't make junk."
Word out.
Paul "I spent $10 on internet today" Murphy
Forgot this great story. So there are several bus companies that run through NZ that are private backpacker oriented buses. I'm on the Stray bus with Mori the post hippy surfer NZ'er. Anyways he makes fun of his competition buses, but knows most of the drivers as they probably see each other quite a bit as there is only so much to see in one place. Anyways we're driving down the road and Mori spots a Kiwi Experience bus coming in the opposite direction. So Mori calls for everybody to go to flash the other bus as we past it. He hollers for people to come to the front. We all just laughed and sat there. So as the Kiwi experience bus passed us Mori lifted his shirt along with a younger Dutch guy. We laughed some more. Mori then told us we sucked for not flashing the other bus. At that point the 61 year old lady pipes up and informs us that she too flashed the other bus. Ewwww! I almost chundered on the cute girl I was "holding hands" with. That story is entirely true expect for the last phrase.
Broken
Riding along the bus and watching people interact in foreign places with foreign people has brought something I've been thinking about into full light. The brokenness of People. By broken I'm talking about the incompleteness that is evident in many peoples lives. Not necessarily some religious aspect but something else. I think a lot, make that most, people don't think of themselves as complete. They think something is missing, that they are not good enough in one way or the other. We all deal with this feeling of brokenness to one degree or anther.
To be whole, complete. Nobody is perfect. But what is it about some people that seems like they are complete? There are some people out there that... that... seem to have it together. They don't readily think of themselves as lacking in any way. Not just a confidence issue but something else. I like to think I'm slowly making my way to being complete. But how?
Everybody has trash, crap, junk in their lives. Some of it is their own fault, some of it was caused by something, someone, else. Everybody has a little brokenness in their lives. There's no getting around it. Like the bumper sticker says "'Stuff' happens." And sometimes that stuff hurts and breaks us, emotionally. Being broken emotionally leaves us two choices, maybe more, but two for now.
Choice one is to ignore the broken part of us and seek acceptance from others. This is what I've seen on my trip. People yearning for acceptance. Incomplete people that mask their brokenness by other avenues. Its really visible in guy/girl interactions. Two broken people trying to fill some missing void of brokenness by... by... other means. Its the mutual crutch. You lean on me and I'll lean on you. But we all know what happens when you lean two things against each other. It only takes a slight movement to knock everything down. The yearning that broken people feel leads them to yearn for acceptance, in sometimes self-destructive ways.
As a guy looking for dates/relationships/whatever one thing I've keyed in on is brokenness and how a person deals with it. It's completely unattractive. Maybe its attractive to others, but not me. Maybe really broken people find other really broken people for some fleeting feeling of acceptance.
Choice two is a better choice. Choice two involves addressing the brokenness directly. Sometimes I feel inadequate because... You fill in the blank. Recognize the issue and deal with it directly, not by looking for verification from other people that your O.K. It shouldn't matter what other people think, and if that's your standard then your doomed to fail. What should matter is what you think. I think I'm good enough.
I'm short. Ok I'm 23 and still have acne. Ok. One ear sticks out further than the other. Ok. My nose is comparable to Tom Cruise. Ok. Emotionally. I've been rejected and turned down. Ok. Does that mean there is something wrong with me? No. Does a teacup still crack when you drop it? Yup. But is the teacup any less useful because you super-glued it back? Nope. Just as good as new. Just as covering brokenness is incredibly unattractive, people who have dealt with it, acknowledged the crack, and super-glued the teacup of their life back together is freaking hot.
Just like an un-mended teacup doesn't work right; neither does an un-mended person. Its ok to have some cracks; we all do. But what's important is to recognize and repair them. Otherwise we wind up looking for verification of our wholeness from other sources than from within. And they don't work.
How do I know my cracked teacup is good enough and not something to be sold for 5 cents in a garage sale? Like an old poster in a preacher's office once proclaimed, "Because God doesn't make junk."
Word out.
Paul "I spent $10 on internet today" Murphy
posted by Paul Murphy at
1:03 AM
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