Stories of a Moron

Monday, April 30, 2007

One of my best and longest friends, Mark Grayson, just kicked me out of his wedding. Mark and I have lived through thick and thin for the last 12, no 14, no 17 YEARS. We spilled blood together, looked for Timmy Boerste together, gone down class 5 rapids together, and now... What did I ever do to deserve this?

1992: Called Mark Stupid
1994: Forced Mark to play hours of "Airplane"
1995: Got Mark in trouble during Wed. night Bible class
1999-2003: Never went to a single Mark Grayson Basketball game
2002: Fell on top of Mark while whitewater rafting
2002: Hit Mark in the privates with a rock, it was neither small nor slow
2003: Completely embarassed Mark in front of a girl he really liked
2003: Used Mark's cell phone to make prank calls
2004: Almost got Mark arrested in a freak "for sale" sign incedent
2006: Made a Lindsey joke at DK's wedding (it was brilliant) (that doesn't look.. if you forgot)
2003-2007: Made fun of Mark for dating a girl three years younger then him. (Are we going to sing "rock-a-bye baby" for the final song at the wedding?)


Paul "Demoted" Murphy

posted by Paul Murphy at 12:21 AM

13 Comments:

  • If I am ever anywhere near the possibility of getting married you and Shaun are invited. Knowing the chances of me ever getting married it is rather likely neither of you could get yourselves "kicked out" of the wedding party.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4/30/2007 6:25 AM  

  • Paul I have to say that if we ever get you married off you'll probably have to elope because of all the people who seek revenge against you.

    P.S. Sorry you got kicked out of the wedding....although I'm guessing there is an explanation beyond "Paul, we don't want you to embarass us so we have replaced you."

    By Blogger MSS, at 4/30/2007 9:58 AM  

  • Texas and Kansas to Nationals…again.

    Texas St. made it to the semis.

    By Blogger Luke Dockery, at 4/30/2007 4:37 PM  

  • Is Michelle proposing?... here's what i read...

    "Paul I have to say that if we ever get [delete] married [we'll] probably have to elope...."

    ahh. wishful thinking.

    on another note, doesn't this mean you will save $90 in tuxedo rental costs? Solid. Murphycheap rules again.

    By Blogger Philip, at 4/30/2007 5:19 PM  

  • Hey, if you are not an official member of the wedding party - doesn't that free you up to pull a really creative "leaving the wedding" prank? I seem to recall one wedding where you left (unbeknowst to the bride and groom) in the car with them.

    By Blogger renee, at 4/30/2007 5:52 PM  

  • don't worry, paul. at least you've got me to compete with in the marriage department. though, you may not want to cook your prospective fiancee scrambled pancakes until AFTER the wedding.

    By Blogger Paulo J, at 4/30/2007 6:29 PM  

  • Wishful thinking indeed.

    By Blogger MSS, at 5/01/2007 8:48 AM  

  • This comment has been removed by the author.

    By Blogger lindsey, at 5/01/2007 3:46 PM  

  • just for the record, mark was very disappointed when he found out you would not be able to be in our wedding. we both still wish you could be, but hope you understand.

    p.s. i seem to have missed the joke you made about me at the kelly's wedding. please tell me what degrading remarks you said about me that time.

    By Blogger lindsey, at 5/01/2007 3:52 PM  

  • Ummmmm no.

    By Blogger Paul Murphy, at 5/01/2007 3:57 PM  

  • At least you didn't get uninvited to your own brother's wedding...Josh? Just Kidding, really.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5/02/2007 12:19 AM  

  • i'm planning on sending you guys an invitation with the alternate spelling.

    By Blogger Josh M, at 5/02/2007 6:41 AM  

  • Ouch! That is some harsh stuff my friend...of course I didn't kick you out of the wedding, it was just sorta difficult with you in Samoa (any cookies yet?). Anyways, I've been pondering our times together and now it is time for my version of all our events...

    1992- I goofed up in a PBC foosball game...paul called me stupid, I quit the team.
    1994-The airplane playing was consensual...hmm, sounds sorta bad.
    1995-We did get in some trouble goofing around in Mrs. Paula's wednesday night bible class
    1999-2003-Well, you and josh actually went to one game at sweetwater
    2003-Well, you see, I was supposed to make sure we went down the waterfall forward...
    2003-I still ache! Lets just say paul was tired of losing in our friendly games of ptc...and yes the rock was neither small nor slow!
    2003-What more can I say, it was a brutal comment!
    2003-So Paul starts looking through my phone and goes, hey is this girl hot, I say yeah, she is cute. Next thing I hear paul saying is some old lady picked up(her mother). Then the mother calls back and wants to know who was calling her an old lady.
    2004-The classic for sale sign incident...aaron was having trouble selling the house. I must agree with your "almost got mark arrested " comment, you were conveniently asleep at home. Thanks buddy.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5/05/2007 6:33 AM  

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